Physicists Suggest Men Should Sit Down to Pee

On the other hand, if you are seriously concerned with catching TEH GAY and don't mind walking around with urine and dirty, piss-water soaked pants, keeping on using those urinals. Brah. But science is no longer on your side. 

A team of four physicists at Brigham Young University (calling themselves “wizz-kids”) has been studying the physics properties of urine splash-back in a urinal-like environment. Their mission was to uncover the fluid dynamics involved in male peeing and to hopefully discern which approach leads to the least amount of splash-back (and less mess). 

They found that peeing at urinals is pretty darn disgusting. 

They also discovered something likely few men have considered—that urine follows what is known as the Plateau-Rayleigh instability—where a pee stream breaks up into drops before striking something else. That's the worst thing that can happen, the team reports, because each drop creates splash-back.

So what do they recommend? THAT'S RIGHT, SITTING DOWN TO PEE.

In analyzing their results, the researchers found that sitting on a toilet, as most men well know, results in the least amount of splash-back.  

However, these scientists did not do a cost-benefit analysis of the amount of ostracization males will receive for their actions. Kicked out the tribe. Also, they didn't factor in how disgusting the average male public toilet is. In instances such as sporting events, even I, an unabashed sitter-downer ,can not condone that sort of reckless behavior. I would much rather have my own piss on my pants than someone else's on my hamstrings.