Robotic Blowjob Machines Are Taking Over The World — Not That We’re Complaining

Before any product is launched worldwide it has what’s often referred to as a “soft opening.” In this case it’s a hard opening because I’m talking ’bout boners. Boners and blowjobs machines.

The Autoblow 2 (also the nickname of Amazing SpiderMan 2) opened a distribution plant in the UK this week. This means men in the UK and Europe can now get their own home blowjob machines without all of the shipping hassles. The product is available internationally but there have been a few problems with shipping overseas. I’m guessing the first problem is bringing the package to the post office and having to say “it’s a blowjob machine” when the clerk asks if there is anything liquid, fragile or hazardous inside.

This is good news for American men because it means the blowjob machine is here to stay. They raised enough money to launch and are already shipping overseas. A couple more paycheck and you’ll be getting a robot hummer right in the comfort of your own parent’s basement.

H/T The Stupid News Network 

Chris Illuminati avatar
Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.