SURPRISE! Scientific Study Says People Who Use Cocaine Are Less Likely To Have Safe Sex

Generally speaking, when you take drugs you are doing so to lower your inhibitions, which may ultimately lead to poor choices. So it was surprising for me to see that there was an actual scientific study that was most likely heavily funded and wasted thousands of hours of some really, really smart scientists to find out that people engage in risky sexual practices after railing a line of coke.

Dr. Matthew Johnson, from Johns Hopkins University, said, “Our study affirms and may help explain why people who regularly use cocaine are more willing to partake in risky sex.”

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The Johns Hopkins study states:

This increased likelihood of unprotected sex due to waiting was greater when they were on cocaine compared to no cocaine. For example, participants on the highest dose of cocaine were on average 40 percent likely to wait an hour to use a condom, but the same participants were 60 percent likely to wait that long when given the zero-dose pill.

Next, the participants were asked to rate the likelihood of using a condom based on a certain probability of contracting an STI, from one in one (100 percent), one in three, one in 13, one in 100, one in 400, one in 700, one in 2,000 or one in 10,000 (0.01 percent) chance. When dosed with cocaine at either dose, participants were more likely to not use a condom when they had a higher chance of contracting an STI, compared to participants who weren’t on cocaine.

So you’re telling me that people on coke are hyper and anxious because they want to fuck before their heart explodes? You’re kidding me. Also, where do I volunteer to become a guinea pig of the study to discover the correlation of cocaine use and sex?

“The bottom line is that cocaine appears to increase sexual desire… They become more impatient when it comes to waiting for sex,” the good doctor said. “If a condom isn’t available, cocaine makes people less willing to postpone sex to get a condom.”

So people engaging in risky behavior are also willing to engage in other types of risky behavior? What a fucking breakthrough.

There was probably tens of thousands of dollars in federal grant money given to these researchers; when all they had to do was give me a $25 gift card to Golden Coral and I could have presented you with the same findings – people hopped up on nose candy don’t have the patience to put on a condom and don’t care about the ramifications of fucking fellow coke users without a rubber.

[DailyMail]