A Terrifying Look Inside The Shady Websites Where Bodybuilders Buy Dangerous Steroids To Get Swole

The Dad Bod may be the crazy du jour, but getting swole never goes out of fashion. Unfortunately, there are shortcuts, with some willing to risk their personal health and well-being by turning their bodies into chemistry sets with steroids.

The shady online marketplaces where bodybuilders obtain dangerous and illegal steroids is the subject of a fascinating profile by Mic. More and more people are turning to steroid advice online, sometimes leading to disastrous results like this guy who thought it would be wise to shoot himself IN THE TESTICLE to prevent shrinkage:

Most of these transactions are taking place on The Dark Web (think: Silk Road from back in the day), according to Mic. And it’s almost always 100% sketchy:

Spartan Labs OZ is an Australian vendor on Black Bank Market only accessible through the identity-guarding Onion Router network. Its owner, who goes by “Spartacus” online, operates as a middleman. A steroid user himself, he’s only ever purchased steroids from one source, he told Mic.

Each week, Spartacus said, he ships 50 orders from two Dark Web marketplaces. Sometimes that’s only 50 products. But occasionally, he claims, the orders are from more serious users who request a variety of products (called a stack), and Spartan Labs OZ will send upwards of 150 performance-enhancing drugs to locations all around the world.

“Most of our customers are hard-working people that want to make a difference to their lives and enhance themselves both physically and mentally,” Spartacus told Mic. “Some are bodybuilders, while others are just normals, regular guys that want to look like a fitness model or reach their maximal potential.”

Go read the whole article over at Mic. It’s a hell of a cautionary tale for juiceheads considering experimenting with ‘roids to get those (faux) gains.

Brandon Wenerd is BroBible's publisher, writing on this site since 2009. He writes about sports, music, men's fashion, outdoor gear, traveling, skiing, and epic adventures. Based in Los Angeles, he also enjoys interviewing athletes and entertainers. Proud Penn State alum, former New Yorker. Email: brandon@brobible.com