Earlier this week, I said the LAST person I’d want to walk in on my girlfriend having sex with was Jared from Subway. That talentless smiley bastard just laying pipe to my soul’s counterpart would be a tough one to come back from. I’d like to officially apologize for unintentionally lying. The very last person I’d want to see when busting through the bedroom door giving my girl the business would for sure be The Mountain. I mean, I couldn’t get pissed about it because he’d tie me in a pretzel, and I probably couldn’t take solace in me having the bigger kielbasa because, well, proportions and shit. So I’d have to lay in the fetal position sobbing until they were done or the bed broke. Maybe offer to film or something. I don’t know, haven’t thought about it that extensively.
Look at this mammoth in Iceland’s Strongest Man competition. He is 6’9″, 419 pounds of everything I’m not. The stones he’s lifting in the video below, deemed ‘Atlas Stones,’ range from 220 pounds to over 350 pounds. At this point he’s just toying with us mere mortals. Check out Hathor Julus Bjornsson (his human name) toss stones around in an effort to win his fifth straight Iceland’s Strongest Man competition.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to get back to my workout.
[H/T Bleacher Report]