#TrumpExplainsMoviePlots Is Currently Trending On The Interwebs And Has Birthed Some A+ Movie Reviews

Oh what a time we live in. I can’t wait to tell my bastard children what a treasure trove of entertainment Donald Trump was. Goddamn electric. The old saying is true: ‘They’re talking about you because if they talked about themselves, no one would listen.” Trump is the topic of conversation from the club house to the strip club. He’s got real estate all over the world, but none more important than the real estate he’s carved out in our heads. What a fucking character, man.

He’s trending again on Twitter, not for anything he said or did, but by means of people reimagining movie plots in Donald’s signature speak. They are quite glorious.

Here are some of the best.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.