Watching These Bros Hopelessly Try To Set Up A Tent While Tripping Balls Is Unrivaled Entertainment

Taking drugs and then trying to set up a tent is like getting sprayed with pepper spray and trying to solve a Rubik’s cube. I needed an adderall, an instruction manual and a fucking Eagle Scout to help me get situated at Bonnaroo. And I’m fairly certain that the Step 1 in the instruction manual is: Make sure your brain hasn’t oozed out your earholes before beginning setup. Because it must be impossible to set up a tent when you no longer have a grasp of what a tent is. The dude in the wife beater at least has an ounce of promise, a trace of leadership. The skinny-fat dude with his shirt off makes me embarrassed to be the same species as him and should be impaled with a tent stake. Publicly. And I don’t even know why these bozos are trying to set up their tent when they’re going to end up sleeping in a hospital bed anyway.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.