When being catapulted 35,000 feet into the air in a 700,000 pound jumbo jet, I tend to blindly comply with the rules and regulations put in place by my pilot and his crew staff. They tell me my seat cushion can be used as a floatation device, in my head I call bullshit, but I take their word for it. They tell me oxygen will be flowing into the mask even though it will not be inflating, I agree, even though that notion strongly disagrees with the laws of physics. They say ‘would you like another double Captain and ginger?’ I nod my head like a good little boy.
But one thing that really chaps my ass is when they come by before we’re even rolling down the runway demanding that I turn my phone on Airplane mode. It’s like I have loved ones to text and ex-girlfriends who NEED to see my latest dick pic, tell the pilot to chill for a bit.
I’ve deferred to the irrational but widespread rationale that not putting one’s phone on airplane mode can tangle the signals to the pilot, possibly sending the plane into a mountainside. As a millennial, it takes this dire possibility of the plane being turned into an accordion for me to consider turning off my phone for a few hours. Pathetic.
But this rationale is bullshit.
According to Daily Mail,
Some passengers believe personal electronic devices such as mobile phones and tablets need to be turned off because they could bring the plane down.
However, there is no evidence signals from passengers’ electronic devices have ever caused a plane to malfunction and crash, and experts said modern technology is safe and reliable.
So then why are those pesky flight attendants putting the brakes on my dick pic game. It’s for the comfort of the pilots. Ya know, the dudes navigating the skies who ultimately decide if you live or die.
If anything, a mobile that hasn’t been switched to flight mode may just annoy pilots and air traffic controllers with an unpleasant sound.
It’s the same kind of noise that can be heard over speakers if a mobile is nearby and it’s due to the phone’s powerful radio emissions.
A pilot added: ‘You’ve probably heard this interference yourself when a phone is set near a speaker.
‘It sounds like a “dit-dit-dit-dit” tone and it’s pretty annoying.’
Although annoying, it’s very rare. The pilot mentions that when flying 50 times, they may hear it once or twice.
Suck it up, dude. I’m stuck in the middle seat next to this obese dude sounding like he just ran a decathlon. CAN I HAVE SOME MORE GODDAMN PEANUTS.
[h/t Daily Mail]