Cole Beasley Must Be Furious After NFL Protocol Sends Him Home For 5 Days Despite Testing Negative For COVID

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  • Cole Beasley has been sent home for five days after being deemed in close contact with a Bills trainer who tested positive for the virus, despite said trainer being vaccinated.
  • Beasley’s five-day quarantine is in accordance with the NFL’s mission to make unvaccinated players lives as bothersome as possible.
  • Beasley himself tested negative for the virus.

The NFL has put Cole Beasley on ice after the Bills receiver was deemed to be in contact with a team trainer who tested positive for COVID-19.

Beasley will spend the next five days at home, presumably reading the FDA-approval docs for the Pfizer vaccine to find evidence of the Illuminati, despite testing negative for the virus. The dismissal falls in accordance with the NFL’s commitment to making unvaccinated players lives tangibly more bothersome than their vaccinated counterparts.

Unvaccinated players are mandated to stay away from the team for five days if they’ve been in close contact with someone who tested positive, whereas there are no restrictions on vaccinated players under the same circumstance. The NFL policies also include more frequent testing (daily for unvaxxed players, every two weeks for the vaxxed), masks and social distancing in the team facility and during team travel for unvaccinated players, ESPN reports.

Fellow Bills receiver Gabriel Davis and defensive tackle Star Lotulelei were also sentenced to quarantine for five days, despite both testing negative.

This is exactly the situation Beasley was railing against while reading a prepared statement during his press conference in late July.

“It’s common sense that if a vaxxed or unvaxxed player is tested less frequently, the likelihood of a player being pulled for COVID drops dramatically,” Beasley said.

Vaccine mandates feel icky to me, but at some point you have to trust that the government isn’t trying to kill us. And if not, you can’t shake your fists at a private corporation whose interest is to eliminate a virus that affects its bottom line. Consequences suck, but Cole Beasley needs the NFL a lot more than the NFL needs Cole Beasley.

Refreshing Beasley’s Twitter page as we speak.

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.