Yep, that’s Jim Harbaugh hanging out with the rap group Migos and posing for the camera while wearing some of their bling.
Reflecting back on my life, my biggest regret is not playing college football for Jim Harbaugh. Granted, there are many other factors that went into my inability to play with him. For one, I didn’t play football in high school. For another, even if Harbaugh was able to overlook my lack of experience, I’m about as athletic as a drug balloon full of baby fat. And finally, Harbaugh didn’t start coaching at Michigan until I was already in college. Why would I want to play for Harbaugh? Because he’s a boss. Sure, he’s just one fanny pack accessory away from dressing like the whitest dad on the planet, but he’ll also do literally anything to land a recruit. Like dabbing on camera, attending a sleepover, climbing a tree or sitting in on a high school class. Imagine how fucking painful it must be for a grown man who has coached in the NFL to sit through an entire high school class? That’s borderline sadism.
Harbaugh reached new heights last night when he jumped onstage at a Migos concert and danced/dabbed with them.
Yes, despite Harbaugh’s most valiant efforts, that was still the whitest thing I have ever seen. The Harbaugh/Migos four-way bromance has been going on for a while now, with Migos showing love for Harbaugh and the Wolverines on Twitter as well as three out of four of them dabbing together on signing day. How does any of this help him with recruiting? Street cred. Imagine saying no to the guy who not only (probably) drinks sizzurp with the group who brought the world such relatable lyrics such as “Look at my dab” and “I’m figgity figgity fucked up” but also who led the San Francisco 49ers to a Super Bowl in 2012 and led the Wolverines to a 2016 victory in the Citrus Bowl. You can’t because there is literally no way to say no to a guy like that.
No word yet on what Harbaugh’s next big move will be in terms of forcing every high school recruit to be obligated to sign with him, but I’m hoping it’s a rap verse on a Migos song. Like really hoping that’s what it is.