Kristaps Porzingis Shoots His Shot With Abigail Ratchford On A Particularly Spicy Instagram Photo, She Responds


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Abigail Ratchford has 6.5 million Instagram followers, thousands of which leave thirsty ass comments on her photos presumably in hopes of receiving a response that they can they jerk it purple to. Rarely, if ever, do they get what they’re looking for.

But the rules of engagement change when you’re an NBA star, despite being a 7’3” Latvian dude who looks like what would come if Stretch Armstrong and Gumby fucked.

Knicks’ power forward Kristaps Porzingis left a subtle but pointed comment on the 25-year-old Ratchford’s Instagram photo (pictured below) in hopes, like the rest of us, to receive a “YES LETS BANG, HERE’S MY ADDRESS’ response.

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Spicy ; ) 🌶🌶🌶 image by SplashNews 📸

A post shared by ⚡️ A R ⚡️ (@abigailratchford) on



Simple, yet to the point.

Ratchford, in true millennial fashion, responded to his emoji comment with one of her own.






It ain’t nothing.

In the next life, I’d like to be rich and famous enough to just throw out a thoughtless emoji comment on an Instagram model’s picture and immediately receive an interested response. Until then, you can find me in the DMs.

Sweet baby Jesus.

[h/t Hot New Hip Hop]

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.