Please Watch This Middle School Chick Fall Victim To The Biggest Track And Field Fail In Recorded History

I mean, you gotta have Steven Avery-caliber luck to have your brain aneurism captured on video as the gun sounds to your riveting freshman track and field practice. I can’t decide which odds are more astronomical–having your brain pull the e-brake at that very moment or someone deeming a freshman track practice worthy of filming. Like that person must have expected GREATNESS. “Becky has a shot at beating the freshman 100 yard dash of 16.3 seconds, how am I going to fit this entire spectacle into an Instagram video!!” Instead, Becky hit the deck like the gun was being shot at her and the internet is a better place for it.

Gotta love the arms out like “what was that completely flat surface doing there?!” Classic millennial deferring the blame.

P.S. If this happened to me during the most insecure, impressionable stage of my life I’d transfer schools and change my name to Billy. Thoughts go out to Becky during this difficult time.

[h/t Barstool]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.