O.J. Simpson Gets Dragged For Trying To Give Colin Kaepernick Advice As A Guy Who’s ‘Been Through Just About Everything’

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If you were to tell me that in the year of our Lord 2019, the red Power Ranger would be behind bars for stabbing his roommate to death with a sword and O.J. Simpson would be literally roaming the streets giving life tips no one asked for, I would ask you for the number to your LSD guy.

But, this is the world we live in. A world where O.J. Simpson can weigh in on current events like your everyday Anderson Cooper.

Today’s lesson from O.J. is directed at Colin Kaepernick.

The NFL informed its teams Tuesday that a private workout would be held for Kaepernick on Saturday in Atlanta, set to include on-field work and an interview with the quarterback who’s been out of football since 2016. Aside from the fact that Saturday is an asinine time to schedule a workout, as half the teams will be traveling to games, several high-level NFL executives were “caught off-guard and confused by the purpose of the NFL scheduling the workout,” ESPN reports.

49ers safety Eric Reid says the workout ‘feels like a P.R. stunt‘ by the NFL to extend an olive branch to a quarterback many believe was blackballed. Ex-NFLer Brandon Marshall confirmed that sentiment by saying the workout ‘seems so fishy.’

O.J. wants Kaep to know, as ‘a guy who’s been through just about everything,’ to know who really has his best interests at heart.

What does this even mean, O.J.? Like who and what are you talking about?

I guess it really doesn’t even matter. I’m just here for the subtweets.

https://twitter.com/FunkyDiabetic1/status/1195025004473307139?s=20

Goodbye, Twitter world.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.