Patriots Fans Are Salty Golden Tate Signed With The Giants After Reports Pegged Him To Land With New England

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“My time is limited. I want to go to a team that has a chance. I don’t want to go to somewhere that’s trying to rebuild…. I want to win now.”

-Golden Tate in January, speaking about his upcoming free agency.

Flash forward two months and the 30-year-old signs with a team who went 5-11 last season, gave up their most electric player, and whose roster construction is an absolute mess.

The Patriots have a reputation of letting the other 31 teams shoot their loads during free agency while they let the dust settle and mechanically and rarely glamorously add pieces to their roster. Thursday reports indicate that the New England signed five players Thursday.

Sexy signings? Far from it. They brought on former Jets defensive tackle Mike Pennel and safety Terrence Brooks, wide receivers Bruce Ellington and Maurice Harris and Broncos tight end Matt LaCosse.

At this point, Patriots Nation knows better than to question their Sith Lord, and have acquired an “In Bill We Trust” attitude. With that said, with the exception of the Michael Bennett signing, Massholes are chomping at the bit to acquire a big name. Or just someone they could identify out of a lineup.

As the free agency deadline neared, Patriots fans were all but convinced Golden Tate would be their newest shiny toy. The enthusiasm was palpable…

Welp, Golden Tate, a man who claimed he was hungry to win, went to an organization who was 5-11 last year and shows no sign of knowing what the fuck they’re doing.

All of Boston’s reaction can be summed up in one short clip:

Thought and prayers out to Patriots Nation.

 

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.