The 0-15 Sixers Are Offering Pizza Discounts For Reaching Special Milestones, Like Scoring 95 Points

The Philadelphia 76ers are an adorable 0-15 this season, but that hasn’t stopped the puzzling franchise from offering pizza discounts to what’s left of their decaying fanbase. Sure, while they lost to the 6-8 Timberwolves in Minny last night, they did score 95 points.

This is the equivalent of celebrating a home run that wasn’t a home run, and instead landed in someone’s glove on the warning track.

Also, doesn’t the use of a pizza emoji within a tweet automatically order a pizza from Domino’s? Papa John’s ownership must be thrilled. What a predictable failure from a team that, more and more, feels like it’s been taken over by the founders of The Onion.

And no, no, no — 76er fans do not need any kind of discount on food.

Sixers-Fat-Guy

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