Here’s How All 32 NFL Teams Would Actually Improve If Tim Tebow Was On Their Roster
As another Tim Tebow-less NFL season kicks off, I’ve had enough. On behalf of Tebow’s millions of passionate fans, Skip Bayless, Scott Van Pelt, Michelle Beadle, Max Kellerman, Mike Ditka, Jon Gruden and Kenny Albert (who I ran into recently) who all believe Tebow should still be on an NFL roster at QB, and not chasing another field of dreams, I’m compelled to speak out. While Tebow’s seemingly swapped his shoulder pads for a baseball glove at a time when there’s been even more enigmatic QB signings and trades around the league, not to mention the consistently bad play at the position, I must invoke the infamous Vince Lombardi and ask, “What the hell is going on out there?!”
If Lombardi understood one thing, it was that when it comes to winning at the highest level of competitive sports, superior talent is almost never the deciding factor. What separates winners from losers has more to do with intangibles like heart, passion, toughness and leadership than it does how hard one can throw or how fast one can run. Yet, despite Lombardi’s values, the modern NFL, year in and year out, seems to de-value the more potent immeasurables. It’s why drafting is such an inexact science, even though the “experts” will lead you to believe, it is, in fact, very scientific. It’s not. It’s the reason why Tom Brady was a 6th round selection and Akili Smith was a top pick.
I’ve never played football, but I’ve been watching with a discerning eye for 40-some years. I’ve seen the difference “winners” make. No one exemplifies winning ideals more than NFL vanquished lightning rod Tim Tebow. Regardless of what you think of Tim Tebow’s QB skills, he remains one of the greatest, most inspiring players to ever play the position. And the most controversial. From high school to college to the pros, Tebow found every way possible to win- and at times, win dramatically. He won a high school game literally on a broken leg. In college he delivered “the speech” that propelled the team to a national title. And in the the pros he consistently delivered late game heroics and defied all skeptics by throwing for 316 yards in a thrilling OT playoff win vs the Steelers. Yet, the NFL refuses to accept he can play QB at a high level.
When people scratched their heads trying to figure at how Tebow kept leading Denver to late game victories in 2010, they showed their woeful ignorance in understanding what makes winning possible. Despite what many will try and argue otherwise, Tebow is a natural QB because he’s a natural leader. He’s a great teammate and an even greater gamer. The only number that matters to this guy is the final score and whether or not you left it all out on the field. I just never thought there would be 32 Owners, GMs and Coaches who could so easily dismiss such obvious attributes. If you don’t want Tebow on your team because of all the attention he brings, then I say, “Don’t bother calling Vanna White to buy a vowel, instead reach out to Kaitlan Jenner and buy some balls.”
I’m not here to debate why teams don’t want Tebow. They all have their reasons. The truth is, no NFL team will be able to convince me they’re better off without a Tim Tebow on their roster. I don’t care if the guy never plays a down, simply having Tebow on your team automatically makes your team “better.” In fact, anyone (and I am one of them) who has met Tebow face to face walks away feeling better about life.
Here’s a breakdown of every single NFL team and why, no matter how many wins they amass, will perpetually remain losers for not signing Tebow and wanting him on their active roster.
Arizona Cardinals – Congratulations! Ex-supermarket bag boy and ex-Arena League star Kurt Warner took your loser franchise to a Super Bowl. You think you can go back with Carson Palmer? Think again. Carson has 159 NFL regular season starts and owns as many playoff wins as one Timothy Tebow. Drew Stanton is 2nd in command. Loser.
Atlanta Falcons – While starting QB Matt Ryan has thrown for plenty of yards and TD’s in his 8 years as a full time starter in the league, he’s also won as many playoff games as Tebow, 1. If you’re counting, which I am, Ryan’s started 126 regular season games to Tebow’s 14. Ryan’s career playoff record is 1-4. Tebow’s is 1-1. Matt Schaub is the Falcons back-up. He’s started 92 games over 12 seasons for 4 different teams. Matt Schaub also has the same number of playoff wins as Tebow, 1- but hey, I hear he throws a nice ball in practice.
Baltimore Ravens – After the Ray Rice incident, the Ravens could have chosen to rebuild their image with a wholesome, righteous man who most men say would be honored to have as a son-in-law. Instead, they signed a guy who refers to himself as “the legend of Ryan Mallett.”
Buffalo Bills – Owner Terry Pegula enters his 3rd season at the helm by rewarding 2nd year QB Tyrod Taylor with a 6-year extension worth $92 million. Keep in mind, Tebow would happily sign for the league minimum which is around $800,000. In 13 career regular season starts, Taylor has 24 total TD’s, 6 INT’s and 7 wins. In Tebow’s 14 career regular season starts, he had 29 total TD’s, 9 INT’s and 8 wins. Not only did Pegula outbid Donald Trump for the right to buy the team, but he also trumps him at bad investments. Let’s not forget he continues to put his faith in Rex Ryan- a man who owns a Mark Sanchez tattoo. Loser.
Carolina Panthers – Is the Super Bowl losing team considered a loser or are they still winners because they won a conference championship? Either way, it’s nearly impossible for the losing Super Bowl team to return and win the big one the following year. Cam Newton is the starter. Cam Newton also backed up Tebow at Florida. Cam and Tim are friends, having each attended one another’s off season charity events. If Tebow had as many NFL starts as Cam and was last year’s Panther’s QB, Peyton Manning does not go out in a blaze of glory. Tebow also never ducks the media. By the way, Newton’s back-ups are Browns reject Derek Anderson and the mighty Joe Webb. Losers.