I had about four PornHub videos buffering and then I stumbled across this video and X-ed out of all them. This is a one-stop-shop. Admittedly, it is tough to wax the kielbasa with nine championship rings on my fingers but these are struggles that I gladly accept. If you think I’m coming off as a douchebag elitist Boston fan, you’re right–but fret not, every other faction of my life has been a colossal failure so I believe I’m entitled to bask in the success of my hometown while I scrounge up some spare change for lunch and wait for my high school ex girlfriend to text me back. I texted her four years ago. You know girls, ALWAYS LATE.
