The Water Coolest is a free daily business news and professional advice email newsletter created for weekday warriors that is delivered fresh daily at 7 AM EST. Dig the insight? Sign up to receive the daily email newsletter …

[protected-iframe id=”0b68b18a05f7cab8f4d27d2e4fbee4f6-97886205-133320964″ info=”https://www.thewatercoolest.com/brobible-form/” width=”500px” height=”100px” frameborder=”0″ scrolling=”no” allowfullscreen=””]

 

THE HEADLINES

Don’t have 3 minutes and 44 seconds to read The Water Coolest? Listen on all of your favorite podcast outlets in 2 minutes or less.

 

NOT TOP, BIT DROP

Crypto markets shed roughly $15B in ninety minutes on Wednesday following news that Goldman Sachs is tabling its plans for a digital currency trading desk.

DJ D-Sol and Co. announced their intentions to build out a crypto trading desk in May. This would’ve marked the first e-currency trading operation at a major Wall Street institution, thus signaling confidence in the speculative “store of wealth.”

What goes up must come down. Following the news, Ether dropped more than 14% and fell below $250, a level it hasn’t seen since last year. Bitcoin fell 6% and dropped below $6,900, Litecoin dropped 11.4%, and Bitcoin Cash was down 13.7%.

Water Cooler Talking Point: “WWSD: What Would Satoshi Do?”

 

SHADOW BAN-TER

Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey and Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg had their day in court … er, Congress. The two testified before the Senate Intelligence Committee mostly discussing 2016 election meddling … and attempting to explain their respective companies’ technology to an audience of aging politicians.

The fiercely bearded Dorsey’s company took a haircut during his testimony. Shares of Twitter fell 1% ahead of Jack taking the hot seat amid a larger tech sector decline but plummeted more than 6% during his Q&A.

The CEO informing the committee and C-SPAN viewers alike that Twitter can’t tell the difference between humans and bots didn’t exactly sit well with investors. Nor did his commentary on Twitter rethinking core parts of its business.

Of course, Dorsey could have chosen to plead the fifth, a la Google. An empty chair labeled “Google” acted as a stark reminder that the search engine giant declined an invitation to be publicly lambasted and shed stock value on live TV.

Water Cooler Talking Point: “Every time I see one of these hearings the only thing I can think about it is Mark McGwire’s piss-poor performance in front of a Congressional committee. Pure gold.”

 

FOX FORWARD

Fox is investing $100M in the streaming startup, Caffeine. The fittingly named streaming service is aiming to compete with Twitch and YouTube by offering a simpler interface.

Fox is in good company, as Andreessen Horowitz and Greylock Partners have already backed a $46M round.

Of course, the ink is barely dry on Fox’s $71B deal that sent the bulk of its television and movie assets to Disney. The new-look Fox aims to make moves in the news and live-sports (including e-sports) arena.

Caffeine will focus on combining its platform and content creation know-how with Fox’s distribution capabilities. Caffeine’s unique partnership with Live Nation certainly helps sweeten the pot.

Water Cooler Talking Point: “Further proof that it’s a nerd’s world and we’re just living in it.”

 

---

IN OTHER NEWS

• Walmart wants to meet you halfway, assuming halfway is your front door. The company is aiming for home grocery delivery in over 100 metro areas in the US by the end of the year.

 

• CVS and Aetna’s $70B merger could be getting the green light along with Cigna’s purchase of Express Scripts, as the U.S. Justice Dept is closing in on antitrust approval for the two moves. Specifics on which assets each company needs to get rid of to move forward are still TBD.

 

• Beamer, Benz, or Bentley. Amazon is going luxe, ordering over 20k Mercedes vans to take their delivery program to the next level.

 

• “We can give you $4 in store credit.” Gamestop shares jumped 15% on news of Sycamore Partners and Apollo Group’s interest in the gaming retailer.

 

You can subscribe at thewatercoolest.com.