10 fascinating revelations by Martha Stewart that make her seem insane but awesome


 

Martha Stewart did a Reddit AMA but really who ISN’T doing one these days?

Normally, I’d ignore an interview with the queen of decorative dishtowels  like ignore all her work but this woman who claims to be the mother of my children said “you should read it, she’s kind of nuts in a funny way.”

Ugh. Fine. I’ll browse it.

Here’s some of the highlights.

Is it true you change your bed sheets everyday?

Yes. It’s a luxury.

How many tacos can you eat in one sitting?

I was at a really good Mexican restaurant yesterday, and I ate one whole taco. I was still hungry.

You have a completely free day. What do you do to have fun for the day? Thank you!

Watch the entire 13 hours of a new season of House of Cards.

Is it true that you paint over the soles of your Louboutins because you don’t like the red sole? And what are some of your fashion rules?

It is true. One of my rules is not to be a slave to fashion.

Do you have a favorite singer or band?

Pharrell Williams. He’s so cute. I’ve actually seen him in person and adore his good humor

Do you have any good sex tips?

Always take a bath before and after.

I know it’s a bit of a touchy subject, but what was your favorite prison food? No disrespect, I honestly am curious about this.

There was nothing remarkable about the food at all.

Favorite football team?

Giants, boo-hoo.

I used to be your neighbor on Turkey Hill Rd. in ct when I was a toddler (lived in the yellow house on top of the hill, across the street). I’ve always wondered if the cookies you handed out on halloween were homemade or store bought – I ask only cause my 4-y/o self was, though appreciative, not very impressed.

Was yours the big yellow Victorian that had lost its top story in a fire? I loved that house. And yes, every single cookie was homemade. I don’t think I’ve ever bought cookies in my life.

Hi Martha, Did you have a prison nickname? If not what nickname would you have chosen for yourself.

I think I did, but I can’t remember.

Alright, let’s put that all together, almost like we’re filling out an OKCupid profile for her.

“Super, super rich woman who paints over the soles of shoes costing thousands of dollars who bakes cookies for children on Halloween in search of man who loves new bed sheets every day, tacos, Pharrell concerts and House of Cards. Must bathe before and after sex, watch football, and be ready to hear about her time in prison. Serious suitors only.”

Yeah. I’d email.

I’m Martha Stewart. Ask me almost anything! It’s a good thing. [Reddit]