The never ending potato famine

Hi everyone,

I started becoming a regular on brobible a couple months ago. I think it is hilarious and fucking love nearly all the articles. I feel one of the reasons I read it religiously is because I do not truly go to “college” yet. I am a freshman at a Penn State branch campus to which I commute. What I like to call pergatory. I would call it hell, but I am not going to be stuck here forever so hell is the wrong word. I have two years of pergatory followed by two years of heaven, PSU main campus. I just finished my freshman year so only 1 year left of this bullshit thank god. So my reading of all these awesome college articles, stories, etc is me living through the website because I have not had the chance to do it all myself yet.​ So I thank brobible for making my life a little less shitty and look forward to my future ascension to heaven where I could party with you all.

So I already compared a Penn State branch campus to pergatory and now I will compare it to the title “the never ending potato famine”. Going to a branch campus you don’t like, or a community college, or any school you commute to that you dislike is like the Irish Potato Famine. It is similar in the way the Irish were stuck in a living hell starving and wanted to get the fuck out but couldn’t. Some lucky ones did though and immigrated to America (University Park). I will be one of those lucky ones who leaves hellish Ireland (PSU branch campus) and immigrated to America the beautiful (UP). It is hard for people who away right away and begin their awesome college experience to be able to understand the plight faced by myself and tons of other guys across America. So I will try to paint a picture of what it is like so you could all see the battle we face daily in not dropping out and doing something rash and stupid.

First off when you commute you have to fucking drive to school, which you don’t even want to go to. I have to drive 20 mins, taking a goddamn highway, a complete pain in my ass. I know people who drive an hour, I pity them. It uses a shit ton of gas and is a  bitch, I would much rather walk to class even if it is rainy or shit. So don’t complain about shitty weather ya pussies, enjoy walking because you will be paying for transportation the rest of your lives. There are no parties, no hot girls, no fun. The campus I go to doesn’t have housing so there are literally no parties or anything all that fun to do. There’s like a total of 10 hot girls in the school. I mean it sucks fucking balls, simple as that. I won’t go into great detail to describe the lack of things to do because it is hard to describe doing nothing. Sometimes I sit in class tapping my neck with a water bottle, thinking to myself “how hard would I have to smash this into my neck to break my trachea?” hahaha in jest of course. So everyweekend when all my friends who have left and are having the time of their lives are partying it up, I am by myself watching netflix, or drinking with one other friend who suffers the same plight as me. I hate weekends more than weekdays because it reminds me of how much it sucks to still be home. You are probably wondering why the fuck I choose this then, if I hate it so much. First off I was rejected by UP (bullshit), secondly finanical reasons. It saves money and I still can work part time and save up for when I do go to UP and have to pay for housing aka beer, and shit. I know thing  would suck when I made the decision to commute to a branch campus and boy I was right.

Now you can feel for me and my commuting brothers, all we want is the freedom and fun you guys have, which we will one day acquire. What can you take from this post? Enjoy it man, enjoy every fucking second of it. Everything you complain about I would proably enjoy. 10 min walks in the rain? That is fucking awesome waayyy better than my twenty minute fucking drive. Difficult times and stress? Being stressed in a place you love is much better than being stressed in a place you hate. Taking the bus to get places? Buses at big universities are fucking awesome! You see intersting  people and may see some hot girls. And the bus is cheap, sometimes free, and gets you where you need to go. That sounds awesome to me. I look forward to all that shit when I get up to UP.

The reason I won’t say which branch campus I go to is because althought the social aspect of it sucks dick. Penn State does a great job providing quality education at its branch campuses. I highly respect all the professors at my campus and the employees. They are well qualified, wise, and helpful. The branch campus system allows people who can’t get into UP right away to still have a shot to live the dream and get up there and eventually enjoy college.