This 12-Year-Old Boy Starts Cornell In The Fall But I Just Ate A Whole Can Of Pringles Alone, So Who’s Really Winning Here?

by 2 years ago


12-year-old Jeremy Shuler is officially the youngest freshman to ever be admitted to Cornell, which has got me wondering how smart he actually is if he chose going to college at 12 instead of 18. Think about it. What kind of shenanigans can you get into when you’re 12? He’s still living at home with his parents, can’t party (what other purpose does going to college serve other than figuring out what your drinking limits are) and will probably get in trouble if he flunks a test/paper. Yow know how many papers I flunked in college? Zero. Ask me how many tests I failed though and I’ll have to pull off my shoes once the count goes past my fingers. It didn’t matter though, because I was 18+ and didn’t have my Mommy and Daddy asking to see my midterms every semester.

But Jeremy doesn’t care, because the kid’s all about “learning” and “intelligence” whereas I was about “Zelko” and “how much of this shit can I memorize the night before the final?” According to Daily Mail, Jeremy read The Lord of the Rings when he was five, started studying calculus at six and was even reading books on his own at 21 months in both English and Korean:

Jeremy fixated on letters and numbers at 3 months old, knew the alphabet at 15 months, and was reading books on his own at 21 months in English and Korean, his mother’s native language.

Enrolling him in kindergarten was pointless.

‘We were concerned about him socializing with other kids,’ his mother said.

‘At the playground he was freaked out by other kids running around screaming. But when we took him to Math Circle and math camp, he was very social.

What a fucking nerd.

As for how he’s adapting to college life, Jeremy says that he was nervous at first but that he’s much more excited now. “Mommy said, all the kids in math camp were older than me, so I’m used to having older friends. As long as they like math,” he explained. “The classes are kind of easy so far, but I know they’ll be harder pretty soon.”

And if you’re wondering what he wants to be when he grows up, Jeremy says he wants a career in “academia.” Yep, kid wants to be a peasant teacher instead of cure cancer or explore Neptune or some shit. What a goddamn waste.

[H/T Daily Mail]

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