The Cinnamon Toast Crunch Saga Is Proof God Wants Topanga Lawrence And Cory Matthews Back Together

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Full disclosure I’m not much of a “God” guy, I gave up on that idea when Tekashi 6ix9ine’s Trollz hit number one on the Billboard Hot 100. But I’m an evidence guy.

And my lack of faith has been tested in recent days due to the resurrection of Jesus a sugary cereal that may or may not have been garnished with shrimp tails and rat dung.

While these intruders are probably the least harmful ingredients in Cinnamon Toast Crunch, this smells extra fishy when you consider who the victim:

TV writer Jensen Karp, more commonly known as the husband of Danielle Fishel, more commonly known as Topanga Lawrence.

[Related: Guy Who Found Shrimp In His Cinnamon Toast Crunch Is Married To Topanga – Internet Reacts With Stupendous Memes]

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for TBS

If you look at the photo above and see nothing but a happy couple, you’re either too young to know better or too old to be reading BroBible.

If this photo blankets you with an all-encompassing feeling of unease and discontent, then I don’t need to tell you that the Boy Meets World, Family Matters, Sabrina The Teenage Witch, Step By Step T.G.I.F. lineup was a murderer’s row of entertainment that may never be touched in Feeny’s lifetime.

Try this one on for size.

Ben Horton/WireImage

Aside from Cory’s charcoal undershirt, this feels…right. Like a rare instance when life should imitate art. Like Jordan is back from his 13-month stint in AA ball, or Jennifer Love-Hewitt finally sparing us of her music and getting back to the big screen.

Jensen Karp is probably a great guy by all accounts, but if God needs to sprinkle a little rat turd in his breakfast delight to give the universe what it wants, then who are we to stand in His way?



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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.