Once The Dancing Coffin Guys Bring Out Your Bottle Service, You’ll Never Be Happy Again


I saw this on Twitter last week but forgot to blog it because I’m eating too much weed these days. First, the dancing pall bearers meme is the funniest thing the internet machine has churned out in a long time, and I don’t usually go in for meme shit. The original ones are the best.

A lot of people have tried to parrot them and most people don’t seem to understand the importance of matching the beat drop with the second the person dies. No matter. We’re not here to judge.

In one of the more brilliant examples of life imitates art, we now have bottle service delivery folks reenacting the meme as they bring champagne to high-roller nightclub tables in Taiwan.

If you’ve never been fortunate enough to ride someone’s coattails into a nightclub table, you might not know that for the right price, they’ll bring your bottles out with great fanfare. On the low end, it’s sparklers and scantily-clad women waving your two bottles of Stoli as you do the math on a cocktail napkin, figuring out exactly how little you can spend to meet the minimum. And nothing will make you feel more like a peasant than watching the guy at the next table get his 12 magnums of Dom from a coffin, carried by a group of dudes who learned a synchronized dance specifically for this purpose. Spectacular.

I’ve seen some tremendous bottle presentations in my clubbing days, but the dancing pall bearers might just take the cake.