Ben Simmons? More like HAS-Ben Simmons! I don’t love myself. Never have.
I know you folks at home are already keeping up with the Kardashians, but as we’ve learned, the ladies change athlete boyfriends in the time it takes to pour yourself another glass of Noir and talk shit about the one friend who couldn’t make it to the watch party.
Kendall—who has dated Ben Simmons, Blake Griffin, Kyle Kuzma, and Jordan Clarkson—was recently spotted at an Arizona rest stop with Suns star Devin Booker, officially completing a starting five that would win 50 games.
The new development prompted someone on TikTok to share a video that brought me great joy.
Credit where credit’s due. Kendall’s cooch came with a People’s Elbow from the top rope.
Good on you, Kendall. But I’d advise you pick up a center if you really want to go deep into the playoffs. May I suggest Tacko Fall?
P.S. We were also gifted with a TMZ headline that you can almost taste.
Jesus, TMZ. Put your hog away. We live in a society.