NYC Health Department Gives Coronavirus Sex Tips: Masturbate And Have Sex With Your Roommate To Flatten The Curve

During the coronavirus pandemic, the New York City Department of Health issued tips for how to enjoy sex and to avoid spreading COVID-19.

iStockphoto / Rattankun Thongbun

During the coronavirus pandemic, all of the health officials have instructed people to practice social distancing and stay at least six feet away from each other. But what if you are dating? Can you have sex during the COVID-19 outbreak? The New York City Department of Health has developed some advice when it comes to sex in the coronavirus era.

New York City wants you to masturbate and have sex with your roommate to flatten the curve of COVID-19 infections. That was two of the many graphic tips that the NYC health department provided in its coronavirus safe sex guidelines.

“You are your safest sex partner,” the official document reads. “Masturbation will not spread COVID-19.” Some of y’all have been practicing the safest form of sex way before COVID-19 was ever discovered.

“Wash your hands (and any sex toys) with soap and water for at least 20 seconds before and after sex,” the NYC Department of Health recommends. Can you put your fleshlight into the dishwasher instead of handwashing?

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You may be sitting at home and asking: “But can you eat ass during the coronavirus pandemic?” Great question. The NYC Department of Health answers that exact question. “Rimming (mouth on anus) might spread COVID-19,” the NYC document states. “Virus in feces may enter your mouth.” You might want to play it safe during the COVID-19 and pass on the salad tossing for the foreseeable future.

“The next safest partner is someone you live with,” the guidelines said. Bad news for you guys who are living with your mom.

“Having close contact — including sex — with only a small circle of people helps prevent spreading COVID-19,” the document reads. “If you do have sex with others, have as few partners as possible.” Looks like you’ll need to narrow your open relationship to a top ten.

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“Kissing can easily pass COVID-19,” the PDF reads. “Avoid kissing anyone who is not part of your small circle of close contacts.”

“Condoms and dental dams can reduce contact with saliva or feces, especially during oral or anal sex.”

“If you usually meet your sex partners online or make a living by having sex, consider taking a break from in-person dates,” the guide says. “Video dates, sexting or chat rooms may be options for you.”

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