‘Would You Eat Stitch Meat?’: Shopper Goes To The Ground Beef Section Of A Grocery Store. Then They Grab ‘Stitch Meat’

Have you ever been looking at everyone’s favorite fuzzy alien, Stitch, and thought, “What does he taste like?” In a viral TikTok, Obvious Plant (@obvious_plant) records from the ground beef section of a grocery store while holding up a pack of “Stitch Meat.” The container features a photo of Stitch from the new live-action Lilo & Stitch movie with a window on his belly so you can see his alien flesh.

The “flesh” is “Ground Beef with Color Additive.” The color in question is blue, of course. However, the meat is not entirely colored blue. Instead, dyed ground beef is mixed with regular ground beef to create an unappetizing marbled effect. The half-pound of beef is 80% lean. And its packaging boasts that it’s a “Great source of protein!”

In the caption, Obvious Plant asks, “Would you eat Stitch meat?”

The answer from viewers is an emphatic “No.”

Many asked what I, as a longtime Stitch fan, was also thinking: Who would want to eat the “cute and fluffy” Experiment 626?

‘That’s Not Meat, That’s Family’

“Who approved that?” one viewer questioned.

A second pointed out the absurdity of the product by imagining what it would sound like to announce to children that their favorite character is what’s on their plate: “Hey kids! We’re having stitch for dinner.” It’s like telling your kids they’re eating Sebastian or Flounder when they have seafood—nightmare-inducing.

Another said this was a continuation of a trend where companies make strangely colored food for movie promotions. “Sonic curry could walk so the stitch meat could run,” they wrote.

I Don’t Really Want It. But Just For Gigs, Where Can I Buy It?

If you were looking for Stitch Meat to hit the shelves at Publix, H-E-B, or Kroger, I regret to inform you that it likely won’t happen. While companies have been known to make colored food for movie promotions (remember all the green food in the aughts to promote Shrek?), Stitch Meat is not a real product. It was created by comedian Jeff Wysaski. Wysaski writes on the Obvious Plant Reddit page that he makes “fake products and leave[s] them in the real world.”

While you can’t buy Stitch Meat, you can buy other prank products from the Obvious Plant store.

Kinda Wish It Was Real?

If your heart sank upon realizing you’d never have Stitch Meat, perhaps this will lift your spirits: Stitch Meat is real… kinda.

Disney collaborated with Hormel Foods to create three limited-edition cans of SPAM that feature artwork from the movie. Given that SPAM is a staple in Hawaii, where the film is set, the collab only makes sense. However, as far as we know, only the can is blue; the meat remains red.

BroBible reached out to Obvious Plant via TikTok comment and direct message.