The most popular bars in Brazil are Osama bin Laden-themed


 

Francisco Elder Braga Fernandes looks very much like Osama bin Laden.

So, he capitalized on the resemblance by renaming his bar after the dead asshole. Sorry, that’s not right. The asshole was alive back then.

“I am a man of goodwill. I can’t stand violence,” says Fernandes, 54. “But this was great for business. No one calls me Francisco anymore. It’s Osama or bin Laden.”

That might seem cynical, but then again, this is Brazil, the country that handed carnival over to professionals and holds nothing so sacred that it can’t be parlayed into a punch line. And Fernandes is no exception.

It’s not cynical, it’s being a straight-up capitalistic shithead. Sadly, he’d not the only person in Brazil who thinks bin Laden deserves his own signature dishes and face on restaurant walls.

A brief Google search turned up nearly a dozen Brazilian establishments named after Al Qaeda’s former terrorist-in-chief, including bars, luncheonettes and one sit-down restaurant called Bin Laden and Family. There’s even a listing for an automobile parts dealer, Bin Laden Bombas, though the telephone apparently has been disconnected. Which may be a good thing, since in Portuguese bombas means “pumps” but also “bombs.”

How about I open a nightclub dedicated to the fire that ripped through a Brazilian nightclub and killed 223 people?

The bar was called Kiss. Naming my new spot Kiss of Death has a nice ring to it. Every night at closing we play The Roof is On Fire.

I’m a man of goodwill. I can’t stand violence. But it’s great for business.

Bin Laden-Themed Bars Are Big in Brazil [Vocativ]

Photo courtesy of whataboutsaopaolo.com.

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Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.