Hulk Hogan turned 61 last night on Raw.
Hogan’s birthday celebration on Raw last night was exactly how I imagine every 61st birthday party goes — no cake (dietary reasons), no strippers (heart reasons) and a group of attendees no one can believe are still alive and kicking.
The usual gang of WWE Legends — meaning those currently under contract — made their way to the ring to wish the orange goblin a happy 61st. Well wishers included “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, Jimmy “Mouth of the South” Hart, “Mean” Gene Okerlund, The Diamond Studd, Vinnie Vegas and a 1940’s cartoon villain in a robe belonging to “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff. Orndorff milked his entrance of all it’s lactose and even went back up the ramp to collect a SECOND kiss from a WWE Diva.
The party was interrupted by Brock Lesnar who, unfortunately, didn’t F5 the entire geriatric gang into red carpeted ring. I’m not one for elder abuse but Flair selling an F5 at this age is on my personal bucket list. John Cena runs to make the save and Raw ends with Hogan’s friends all splitting a new piece of soft toast.
After Raw went black, the party continued, and another old friend of the Huckster joined in on the celebration and toast gumming — the one and only Chairman of the WWE, Vince McMahon.
Flair, Piper and even Nash and Hall are fun to see for about five minutes. I didn’t pop but each entrance did bring out some goosies under the arm hair. Except for Mr. Wonderful, the guy always bored the hell out of me, even as a kid. But if No Chance hit and McMahon’s face flashed on the Jumbortron I would have screamed like teen girl discovering her first vaginal blood loss.
Vince McMahon needs to get his ass back on TV. The sooner the better.
[via Wrestling Inc]