Bartenders Shared Stories Of The Best/Worst 21st Birthday Celebrations They’ve Witnessed And Now My Liver Hurts
A 21st birthday celebration has become a rite of passage in which a bro celebrates getting to toss aside that fake ID and order his first legal drink in America. He then continues ordering those legal drinks until his liver wants to jump out of his body and take a sponge bath. Sometimes these nights end in disaster and shame, other times they end up being the greatest night of a man’s life. More often than not though, the 21st birthday celebration is forgotten, and the only person who walks away from the night remembering all the details is the bartender (or bar owner). Below is a collection of short stories from bartenders and bar owners of the best and worst 21st birthday celebrations they’ve ever witnessed, and they are fanfuckingtastic.
Best: Big group of girls come in to celebrate a few of them turning 21. It’s also karaoke night, and they take turns picking songs for one another. They’re all picking your favorite romantic soft-rock hits of the 80’s, and every one of them sang their little hearts out. It was amazing, and silly, and they all had a blast. They tipped well, no one got dangerously sloshed, and the one girls’ dad picked them up in a bus to go home.
Worst: Bunch of dudes come into my dive bar, and keep trying to order stuff we don’t have. Like, if you’re in a place with Pabst on tap, stop trying to order Grolsch. They also kept trying to grab stuff from behind the bar (shot glasses, soda gun, me), and were demanding shots, shots, shots. The last straw came when King Dudebro started trying to light shots on fire, then dumped flaming shots out on the bar. Then vomited on them. I charged his friend double for the flaming shots no one got to drink, then another $100 for clean up.
Co-own a bar:
Best: Bachelorette Party decided to have an impromptu wet t-shirt contest.
Worst: Once a month, someone reserves a table and sets up their own party decorations, orders a couple pitchers, and sets out a cake or something… and nobody shows up to their party. I’d say that is the worst one emotionally. Other than that, the “bro’s” – the guys that come in with MMA or Affliction shirts or some shit and come up to the bar and order 10 shots and then proceeds to do 5 of them, and the other 5 disappear. Those are the guys that Want to fight prior to even showing up. It’s worse when there are huge groups of them.
I’ve worked countless 21st Birthday Parties and they can be both hilarious and devastating.
Worst?: Birthday Girl fell down a flight of stairs and smashed her mouth up pretty bad. We found a tooth later that night and a dent in the floor boards where the tooth broke off.
Best?: Birthday Boy got busted by the bouncer for taking a piss in the back garden. The bouncer carried him out kicking and screaming with his dick hanging out.
My husband used to bounce at a nightclub for extra cash.
Some short little putz came in for his birthday party, and proceeded to get tanked in the back bar- the whole group is doing blow in the bathroom, while becoming increasingly obnoxious to the bartender.
Husband is talking down what they thought was the most obnoxious partygoer, when suddenly birthday boy stands up on his barstool, and in an amazing feat of shit-faced gymnastics, proceeds to jump OVER a friend and spear tackles husband into the ground by the neck- instant concussion, chipped teeth.
Birthday boy tried to escape out the back door, but on of the off duty cops working the club chased him down. Turns out the cop ended up breaking his foot on the drunk on a curb.
Bar Owner: This kid and his friends come into my bar on his 21st birthday! He gets beyond hammered, after a few too many shots starts running to the bathroom. About 3 steps into his wonderful journey to get to a toilet he starts spewing partially digested alcohol all over the walls, floors and himself.
He left a trail of puke that hansel and grettle would be envious of. Now I must enter the next part of the story with the fact that my bar is small. Really small.
We tell his friends to get him the fuck out. While they are “taking care of him, he decided to grab the fire extinguisher and empty it like his stomach 7 minutes prior. If you’ve ever sprayed a fire extinguisher you know it comes out as a very heavy awful tasting dust, which is more impossible to clean than glitter.
Even worse, all these dumb 21 year olds thought they ingested something toxic into their lungs. So an armada of 8 police cars, 3 fire trucks and 5 ambulances came to take these “dying people” to the hospital.
TLDR: fire extinguisher is one hell of a way to clear out a bar on a Saturday night
So if you saw my tweet from over the weekend I’d like to clear the air and say this wasn’t me. It wasn’t my 21st birthday when this happened (and there certainly wasn’t 8 police cars):