Every couple weeks, it feels like a Bro comes up with a new game changing “invention” for beer pong. The recipe for these inventions is almost always the same: Usually the creators of pong invention start a Kickstarter to market said invention and profit when said invention goes viral on blogs like BroBible and Buzzfeed and Food Beast and Mashable, all clamoring for those sweet, sweet Chartbeat traffic spikes that come with beer pong/bro entrepreneurship stories. Case in point: Mountain Pong, Slip Cup, and Vert Pong.
On one hand, you can’t hate these Bros for aspiring to hit Cartman’s four-point entrepreneurial plan for making fat stacks off Bros who love beer pong. Hell, this is the capitalist ethos that’s driven BroBible since the very beginning:
On the other hand, these Kickstarter beer pong inventions have become redundant and kind of silly — the classics are the classics for a reason. Does making beer pong more sanitary i.e. Slip Cup or adding an extra rack of tilted cups i.e. Mountain Pong really make an iconic pastime more enjoyable? I’m sure their founders would tell you yes, but they’re financially motivated to get you to purchase their product.
Chris Furnari, an editor of the craft beer trade publication Brewhound, had a wonderful rant on these the general lameness of beer pong products on Twitter this afternoon. If you’re burnt out on these inventions like I am, you’ll enjoy reading it.
Well, it’s been a few weeks since a new beer pong kickstarter came across my radar. Introducing, MOUNTAIN PONG!!! http://t.co/3bxmggEb4z
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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Seriously tho, is there an elaborate network of bros I can reach (@BroBible?) to tell all bros to stop w/ shitty kickstarter pong gimmicks?
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
“duuuuuuur, I just wanted to take like a regular game of beer pong and make it, like, not regular… dude.”
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
“duuuuuur, like I couldn’t get a real job so I totally came up with this awesome beer pong game and put it on kickstarter.” #entrepreneur
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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.@brandonwenerd @BroBible Here’s the thing…beer pong is a game that you play fairly regularly until you’re about 24 or so…
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
.@brandonwenerd @BroBible and then you wake up one day + realize it is one of those games you’re totally cool w/ playing like twice a year.
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
.@brandonwenerd @BroBible so you trade the natty light for an IPA, locate the nearest cornhole board and sub in bags for balls.
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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.@brandonwenerd @BroBible and here’s the thing: I don’t see anyone trying to “innovate” cornhole. It’s an adult game. Doesn’t need it.
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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.@brandonwenerd @BroBible But back to beer pong… why are so many people trying to innovate? Will any of these creations ever pan out?
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
.@brandonwenerd @BroBible because let’s be honest — if you’re gonna play pong, you’re just going to buy red solo cups, a 30-rack and balls
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
.@brandonwenerd @BroBible you’ll get drunk on light beer, probably pick up a case of mono, and throw away all evidence the next morning
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
.@brandonwenerd @BroBible and that is why these silly beer pong "innovations" won't work. No adult wants to overpay for tomorrow's trash
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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.@brandonwenerd @BroBible and don't get me wrong, I'll play pong all night long every six months or so…but the old school way.
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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.@brandonwenerd @BroBible and on that note…I have a game of flip cup to get back to. #RealBrosPlayFlipCup
— Chris Furnari (@BrewboundFurn) July 29, 2015
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What do you think, Bros? Valid points? OR: