Mega Douche Boyfriend Dumps Girlfriend With Flowers And An Aggressive Note That Probably Will Ruin Her Life

by 4 years ago



My father always said to take the high road. He used to say “take the high road, the view is much better.” Actually he never fucking said that, I just looked up that quote on Google. I was basically taught to burn bridges and scorch the earth i anyone wronged me. My father was a tough love kind of guy. When I was a kid I literally tried to burn an actual bridge in my town. I now know what a ‘metaphor’ is.

It looks like this British dude named Ally (yes, dude named ‘Ally.’ Goddamn Brits) is just a grown up version of my childish self after dumping his girlfriend in an absolutely BRUTAL manner.

It started out as a kind, thoughtful gesture from one loving boyfriend to a deserving girlfriend.



Awww. Her favorite. Ally, you shouldn’t have!

No really, Ally–you shouldn’t have.




The contents of the note:


We were never meant to be, there is no way you would ever be my forever. Your a bit of a cunt and I hope you find someone who can love you for it.
Don’t try to message me because your number is blocked.

Ally x

P.S. You were a shit shag.

There has to be motive. You don’t just break out ‘cunt’ because you’re no longer fulfilled in the relationship.

To confirm this theory, I invite in Gigi, a friend of the girl who got dumped who posted it to Twitter. Like a good friend.




Regardless of the murky circumstances, we can draw one tried-and-true conclusion from all this:

love sucks


[h/t Happy Place]