Bro’s GF Calls Him Childish, He Responds Like Any Man Would: By Building ‘Fort Kick-Ass’

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Craigslist


There’s no such thing as being too childish when you’re inside of Fort Kick-Ass, the house fort one bro built after his girlfriend ‘said she wanted to have a conversation’. She wanted to be all boring and annoying, and he just wanted to erect Fort Kick-Ass and do bro stuff inside his fort. The thing about Fort Kick-Ass though is that it’s a lonely fort, so this bro put up a Craigslist posting for any bros out there who want to kick it with him inside of Fort Kick-Ass, complete with pizza, his dog, and a great view of the TV for watching Netflix. Here’s his glorious Craigslist posting in its entirety:

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Craigslist


For those of you who don’t actually believe that there is both a dog AND pizza, here he is with a pic to prove you wrong:

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Craigslist


house-fort-craigslist-posting

Craigslist


You can find the listing HERE on Craigslist, but for those of you who want a transcript here it is:

MY GIRLFRIEND SAID SHE WANTED TO HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT ME BEING TOO CHILDISH, BUT SHE DIDN’T KNOW THE PASSWORD TO GET IN.

SO SPACE IS NOW AVAILABLE….

FORT FEATURES WIFI & A GREAT VIEW OF THE TV FOR NETFLIX

SET UP IN THE CORNER, SO ITS ALWAYS 90 DEGREES INSIDE.

HAS BIG FUZZY GUARD DOG FOR SECURITY. UNLESS YOU HAVE PIZZA. THEN HES WORTHLESS.

NO GIRLS ALLOWED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (unless you have pizza)

RESPOND WITH YOUR FAVORITE DISNEY CHARACTER IN THE SUBJECT.
NAME ALL 151 ORIGINAL POKEMON, AND DESCRIBE YOUR PREFECT SUNDAY.

IN CASE OF AN EMERGENCY, GATHER THE DRAGON BALLS, AND CONTACT PROFESSOR HUBERT FARNSWORTH; PLANET EXPRESS, NEW NEW YORK.

My ONLY question is this: why in the hell is ’90 degrees inside’ a selling point on anything other than a jacuzzi? Even with a jacuzzi that’s about 10 degrees too cool. There’s not a single thing in life that I can think of where 90-degrees is the correct temperature. This bro needs to go back and discuss there being an available A/C unit if it gets too hot…Are forts hot? Is his GF hot?

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