Tonight’s Powerball jackpot is expected to be a record setting $1.5 billion. Money like that is immediately going to turn someone into an empire maker. Yesterday, I blogged Mark Cuban’s ‘6 Pieces Of Advice For Whoever Wins‘ and for the most part he’s spot on. The overall gist of his advice is ‘don’t be stupid with your money, play it safe and you’ll be more than comfortable for the rest of your life’. That’s what this article’s about, this one right here’s about all the crazy shit you can buy if you win the record $1.5 billion Powerball jackpot.
First up let’s take a look at all the countries who’s GDP is less than tonight’s Powerball jackpot. I’m not suggesting that you can actually buy these countries when you win the Powerball tonight but if they were for sale then you could afford to buy them…maybe:
Seychelles: 1,473
Saint Lucia: 1,345
Antigua and Barbuda: 1,236
Solomon Islands: 1,159
British Virgin Islands: 1,095
Guinea-Bissau: 1,040
Gambia: 918
Grenada 839
Samoa: 825
Vanuatu: 816
Saint Kitts and Nevis: 812
Sint Maarten: 795
Saint Vincent and the Grenadines: 745
Northern Mariana Islands: 733
Comoros: 722
Saint Martin: 562
Dominica: 514
Tonga: 494
American Samoa: 462.2
São Tomé and Príncipe: 362
Federated States of Micronesia: 339
Palau: 259
Saint Pierre and Miquelon: 215
Cook Islands: 183.2
Marshall Islands: 183
Anguilla: 175.4
Falkland Islands: 164.5
Kiribati: 164
Tuvalu: 39
Niue: 10.01
Nauru: N/A
If the Powerball goes up to $2B, which there’s an over 20% chance it does after tonight’s drawing of numbers, here’s a list of companies that could be purchased with the winnings:
https://twitter.com/carlquintanilla/status/687315656136650752
By the way, here are your chances of winning
This Million Dollar Cigar Humidor Is The Most Outrageous Gadget I’ve Ever Seen
This million dollar cigar humidor is quite possibly the most over-the-top gadget ever built. First off, the fact that anyone in the world has a million dollars to drop on a cigar chest is fucking awesome. And secondly, I’m blown away by the notion that someone somewhere had the idea to build a million dollar cigar chest.
I first came across this item over on Uncrate, and then jumped on over to the manufacturer’s website (they’re Swiss based), and went down the rabbit hole of learning about the most asinine cigar chest ever manufactured. Now I don’t want to give away too much, so I’ll just tell you about the way the chest is opened (according to their website):
“By brushing a finger over the golden touch buttons forming the 9 letters of Imperiali, the previously invisible LCD screen is activated. Touch one or several of the buttons to enter the correct code sequence, chosen and kept secret by the Emperador’s owner.”
The Patek Caliber 89, A Watch costing $5,120,000
According to CoolMaterial.com, the Patek Caliber 89 is a watch that will set you back over $5 MILLION DOLLARS. You could buy THREE Bugatti Veyrons for the price of this one watch. But hey, if you can afford this watch then you can also afford to buy three Bugatti Veyrons…right? For more on this watch click here.
Real Estate
You could purchase seven thousand nine hundred and forty homes, at the median home price in America. Of course you wouldn’t buy 7,940 homes in America at the median price when you could buy 3 or 4 badass homes for a few million per house. That’s what you’d do because you’ll want to live like a goddamn king.
You could purchase the Playboy Mansion, which is on sale for $200 million. You could buy this town in South Dakota (saloon included) which only costs $250,000. Or you could buy the MOST EXPENSIVE HOME IN AMERICA, a Florida mansion that’ll set you back $159 MILLION.
Smart Money?
This is how Mad Money’s Jim Cramer would spend his $1.5 billion in winnings:
https://twitter.com/carlquintanilla/status/687276437037019137
Because why the fuck not?
You could buy nearly a billion gallons of gas right now in Tampa, Florida where the cost of gas starts at $1.75/gallon.
You could buy 21,459 Tesla Model S cars and drive a new car every day for the rest of your life.
You could buy 379,746 tickets to the Super Bowl (at last year’s average ticket price). Fortunately for you there’s not that many tickets to go around, so you could buy the sickest fucking tickets in the stadium.
YOLO
You could follow in this man’s footsteps:
James Bond’s Car
You could over over 5,300 2015 models of the Aston Martin Vanquish:
That Yacht Life
You could buy the world’s most expensive yacht, the ‘Streets of Monaco’. A boat so extravagant it hasn’t even been built yet. A boat that will set you back ONE BILLION DOLLARS:
Here’s one we know will cost a billion. The difference between this yacht and number three on this list is $650 million – it’s nearly triple the cost! So what does your billion buy you? Well nothing yet, this one’s still in construction. The design of this fantastic yacht is unlike the traditional model we’ve come to know and love. There’s all manner of things you absolutely need on the high seas – like a go-kart track, your own private beach and man-made lake, and a ship deck designed to replicate a city-scape. Included are reproductions of casinos and a replication a Monaco Grand Prix track.
The Bridge Suite at The Atlantis Resort and Casino
https://www.instagram.com/p/BAVfncHHHbU/
You could stay in the Bridge Suite at Atlantis Paradise Island. This is a room that costs $25,000/night, you could stay there for sixty thousand nights….or until the sun burns up the earth’s atmosphere.
Professional Sports Teams You Can Purchase
You could buy The Mets, Phillies, Angels, Nationals, and about 25 other MLB teams. You could buy the Tennessee Titans, Jacksonville Jaguars, St. Louis Rams, Cincinnati Bengals, Detroit Lions, Oakland Raiders, or the Buffalo Bills.
And last but not least, you could buy 285,714,286 packs of cigarettes in the state of Virginia.