Jack in The Box Thinks Americans Aren’t Eating Enough Meals In Their Days, Is Launching A New One

KEN WOLTER — Shutterstock

For the entirety of human history, we had three goddamn meal times. Breakfast, the meal you eat at the beginning of the day; Lunch, the meal you eat the middle of the day; and Dinner, the meal you ate at the end of the day.

(I know this is factually inaccurate and that three meals a day is a relatively new concept, but fuck that. It’s what I know and love.)

In 2007, Taco Bell came along and tried to shake shit up with Fourth Meal. A fourth meal. One more meal than what you are supposed to have.

Fucking shit.

Fucking shit, man.

Now, another fast food joint wants to add a fifth fucking meal to the day. Five fucking meals. What are we, giant pandas? Who eat all day?


Tell that to Jack in the Box, though, who has now coined the term “Brunchfast.”

What is Brunchfast? Fuck if I know, other than the meal between breakfast and brunch.

Jack in the Box has not announced what they intend to do with the trademarked name, other than send Americans to an early grave.

Also, The Simpsons really already fucking did it.

[Via Eater]