LOL You Oyster Lovers Are Sucking Down Bits Of Shit Every Time You Inhale One

by 3 years ago
oysters-norovirus

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Pretty much ever since I began having a public social media presence, I often and adamantly stated how gross oysters are.

There’s no arguing this point. Look at them. They are gross. They look like someone whisked up a shitload of saliva and semen and poured it on top of a overly set piece of pissed-flavored gray Jell-O. I don’t get what anyone sees in them, and people who consume them have serious mental health defects.

Everyone thought I was wrong for this. They were all like Oysters, Oysters Oysters are delicious.

Cool.

Now allow me to enjoy some sweet, sweet vindication, because every one of you who sucked one down their mouth and chomped on whatever that soggy, fleshy thing is that you call pleasurable, you were putting some shit down your throat, too.

Oysters appear to be an important link in the transmission of norovirus among humans, according to new research from China.

The scientists found that 80 percent of the known human noroviruses matched those found in oysters. The majority of the matches were in oysters from coastal waters, more likely to be contaminated with human sewage.

SLURP IT SLURP IT SLURP THAT SHIT YOU PSYCHO FUCKS.

Me, I will continue not eating oysters, like I was already doing.


TAGSOystersoysters are bad