See, this is why we can’t have nice BDSM movies.
In what was supposed to be a romantic Valentine’s Day date turned into pinot grigio vomit and blood flowing down the aisles of a movie theater. Michael Bolton, 33, (There was nothing wrong with that name until that no-talent ass clown that became famous and started winning Grammys) was the perfect Valentine and took his wife Yvonne, 32, to see Fifty Shades of Grey. He described the crazy scene at a showing of the naughty movie in a U.K. theater that also has a bar, “Besides being the worst film I have ever seen, three women were getting arrested and put in a police van when we arrived.” He went on to say, “One woman was in handcuffs and another two women were in tears.” That should have been your sign right there to get the fuck out of Dodge.
Apparently there were some women who indulged in a few too many chardonnay merlots and got a bit rambunctious. One man in the audience took exception to the loud noise and asked the rowdy ladies to quiet down because he was interested in the plot. They allegedly threw a wine glass at the man, which cut him and he starting bleeding. Insult to fucking injury right there.
Witnesses claim that the staff at Grosvenor theater in Glasgow had to wipe blood off the seats before the next screening. They also said that intoxicated women were puking. I heard the movie was bad, but I didn’t think is was that repulsively bad.
There’s your excuse to your girlfriend as to why you can’t see Fifty Shades of Grey, it’s far too dangerous for anyone with a penis to attend.