7’1” Hornets Center Spencer Hawes Cockblocks His Friend With A Piss Poor RKO Outta Nowhere

SPENCE. Don’t be shy, bro. Grab his fucking neck and make him think twice about ever trying to spit game to a chick at the mansion YOU paid for again. A dude of your size delivering an RKO on an average human should result in scooping his lifeless body off the pool floor with the skimmer. Instead you grabbed his hat and the crown of his head and delivered the sloppiest RKO since the inception of RKOs. The chick probably was hailing a cab before you two even popped your heads up from underwater. Piss poor. Somewhere Randy Orton is shaking his head. Not in the angry way, but the way that your dad does when he find out you can’t graduate on time because you spent your entire college career wasting his money on weed and Natty Light. Grow up, Spence. Be better.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.