I don’t curse a lot. I fucking curse all the goddamn time at motherfuckers. I’m not 10-years-old and my life isn’t some cleansed and censored episode of Brady Bunch. I’m a real person talking how real people talk in the real world. There’s plenty of fucking assholes like myself that use the word “Shit,” like it was the word, “The.” Don’t believe me? You calling me a fucking liar? Well asshole, check out these fucking maps.
There’s a fucking map that shows where all the assholes living who are living in shitty places that appreciate using the always endearing “Motherfucker.”
“Fuck,” probably the most versatile word in the entire English language because it can be used as a noun; “Tommy is a dumb fuck,” verb; “We fucked all night,” pronoun; “That fuck ate all of the tacos,” adjective; “What a fucking fuck,” “Fucked if I’ll give you my last Not Your Father’s Root Beer,” adverb; “Linda is fucking fucked,” conjunction; “I prefer pepperoni pizza, but fucking Mike prefers anchovies,” preposition; “So, where’s the Uber? Fuck if I know,” and interjection; “Fuck! I was sure I could find a something good to watch on TV!”
This fucking research is the hard work of Jack Grieve, a lecturer in Forensic Linguistics in the School of Languages and Social Sciences at Aston University in Birmingham, England. Utilizing geotagged data from Twitter, he created this incredible infomap that displays where popular curse words are used most heavily in the country.
You can see where the most “Assholes” are.
You can even see where the most “Shit” is.
And for you shitty goody-two-shoes, here’s where “Gosh” is used the most in the United States. Good for you asshole, and your fucking dedication to not saying naughty words.