Cocktail hour is unequivocally the greatest hour there is to drink in the world. Cocktail hour is associated with conversation, mingling, starting to feel that tipsy kick in and of course – appetizers. There is few joys greater than cocktail hour left in this world, because it eases you into more booze and larger portions of food.
It’s the greatest social gateway there is in society. Cocktail hour represents understanding how to small talk, but also understanding how to dive into a deeper conversation when someone drunkenly says something like, “Well, that [insert celebrity or politician].” Cocktail hour is when you can let loose, unwind from your day and begin to remember you don’t hate being alive per se. What you drink during this hour gives us a deep insight into the kind of person you are outside of this time frame.
You’re an upstanding gentleman of the surrounding community. You enjoy golf on the weekends and wearing pleated pants on any day. Your hair may be thinning, but that’s only because you run your fingers through it every time you make one of those slick business deals.
You’ve seen the entirety of Sex and the City, possibly more than once. You’re hard working, but play just as hard. You’ll boldly go into a nightclub, even once you’ve entered that age where it’s a little past your prime, sit at the bar, order a Cosmo and channel your inner sexy smirk.
You enjoy the finer things in life, such as little olives on miniature plastic swords. You know how to handle yourself, after all you’re at a point in life where you can afford a martini at cocktail hour. Two to three of these will be necessary for you to get your fix.
Dark And Stormy
You wish that at any moment you could be whisked away to that island vacation you’ve always dreamed of. You listened to Bob Marley as a rebellious teen, but now you listen to Bob Marley as smugly intelligent adult. You often wear your shirt unbuttoned possibly one button too low.
You know how to have a good time, but also don’t mind regrettable decisions, the first of which will be having a handful of margaritas during cocktail hour. You know you should slow down, but you’ll probably just get a fishbowl margarita to go with dinner. There’s no stopping you.
You have a refreshing personality, calming voice and overall sense of content with that is going on in the world. You probably wear white on nearly every occasion, and can often be found sitting on a porch somewhere just enjoying the view.
You’re probably just barely of the drinking age and just enjoy a bunch of stuff getting blended together. In fact, it might not be a daiquiri at all, but you sound a bit more mature and knowledgeable calling it that.
You’re exactly what the name of your cocktail hour beverage choice is: old fashioned. If you’re a man, your hair is slick. If you’re a woman, it’s rather large in style. You enjoy meat and potatoes, reading the newspaper and telling people to keep their mouths shut.
(Whatever) And Tonic
You don’t want to simply sip on shots, so you add a little carbonation to your favorite liquor. Although, you’re not going to be too happy if the tonic to liquor ratio tips in favor of the tonic. You need the taste of that liquor, but tonic makes you feel like you’re not slipping into addiction.
Commendable – you’re not getting too crazy with the liquor, but you are about to get a little crazy on a cheese board. You enjoy it chilled and you enjoy chill music to be playing during cocktail hour. You’re chill.
You go full steam ahead into the evening and end up with purple teeth by the end of it. You enjoy very rich foods and are potentially just that yourself.
You like cocktail hour to feel like a celebration. You like celebrations. You often throw dinner parties. This is probably a cocktail hour at your dinner party. You like getting attention.
You probably stumbled when asked what you wanted to drink, “Uh, beer is good.” Yeah, beer is good, but so are plenty of other options that are most certainly available at a cocktail hour gathering. You’ve probably worn jeans to a formal gathering before. They were darker jeans, but still.
Cocktail hour image by Shutterstock