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First dates pretty much fall into one of two categories. They’re either so good that you can hardly wait until the next time you see the person or they are so awful that they make you question whether there’s even any reason not to just remain single for the rest of your life.
These stories shared on Twitter with the hashtag #WorstFirstDate and, in some cases, again later on The Tonight Show by Jimmy Fallon, fall into the latter category and may just cause you give up on dating completely.
The being said, if you are a glutton for punishment and insist on continuing to go out on first dates with people, there are at least some lessons to be learned from these stories.
Protip #1: There is absolutely no reason whatsoever to mention your nostrils while on a first date. None.
Protip #2: Never do anything to your date called a “puppy trumpet.” Trust me on this one.
Protip #3: Your first words when she answers the door should never be, “It’s not pee.”
Got it? Good. Here a whole bunch more tales of first date failure that you can file away under “things not to do.”
https://twitter.com/KyleC4u/status/951869381189005314
https://twitter.com/raye_hiratsuka/status/951868955781750784
I was out on a date with a coworker.He said before we go out he needed to stop at Walmart to get a few things. He grabbed a belt & underwear went to pay and forgot his wallet and asked me to pay. Then he wanted to know where I’m taking him next. Date was over #WorstFirstDate
— Rogue (@hunt_piwak) January 12, 2018
#WorstFirstDate True story: Chatting for 20 minutes about our dogs and cats. The guy tells me he spent 3 days in a psych ward after chasing his ex with a shotgun. Dating is dicey
— claudia (@NastyClaudia) January 11, 2018
I met a girl for a blind date once. She didn’t say a single word throughout dinner, finished her meal and walked out. I then checked my phone and there was a msg from the girl saying she couldn’t make it tonight… Who the hell did I eat with!? #WorstFirstDate @jimmyfallon
— Scott Sedore (@sedore93) January 10, 2018
He took me to a restaurant and went to the bathroom a lot and stepped out often to take calls. I thought it was weird, and then the waiter said “you know he’s at another table with a blonde woman right?”. he had 2 first dates at once #worstfirstdate 😂
— Kel ⸆⸉ (@see_kel) January 10, 2018