Draymond Green’s Excuse For Kicking Steven Adam’s In The Balls Is Downright Laughable


Draymond Green booted Steven Adams in the nuts in the Thunder’s Game 3 Western Conference Finals win last night. He was issued a flagrant foul, a light punishment for trying to neuter a man. If you believe the the kick was unintentional, you’re probably gullible enough to still believe in Santa Claus and unicorns and true love. There is no way of convincing me that a dude who used to fight grown ass men as a kid wasn’t looking to make Adams cough up his beanbag. It couldn’t have been more obvious he intentionally teed off on his coin purse if he put his hand in the air like Adam Vinateri before kickoff.

Draymond owned up to his mistake after the game. Just kidding, he blamed it on his abs.

The other camp had differing opinions.

I understand deferring the blame is the only card Draymond has to play, but I’m honestly impressed he could swindle that tall tale about his core strength without bursting out laughing. I guess when you’re on the cusp of taking yourself out of the Western Conference Finals and vastly increasing your chances of going down 3-1, selling the lie is essential.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.