Father Writes Comprehensive NFL Scouting Report For Infant Son

by 4 years ago
NFL Draft Football


A very optimistic Houston Texans fan thinks he has the next Hall of Fame quarterback on his hands. The only thing is, it will be a few years until we find out if he’s right.

Like, 22 years.

That didn’t stop him from compiling a complete scouting report for his baby boy, highlighted early strengths and weaknesses.

His technique is still very raw.

Right now I’d characterize him as a “scrappy, gym rat” but he is going to be putting on a lot of mass during the the offseason.

He has a hard time seeing the whole field and going through his progressions because his neck doesn’t fully support his head. Trainers aren’t worried. Cannot currently make all NFL throws.

Good, loud hard count, strong cadence, can be heard from many rooms away.

System guy, has been coddled thus far in his career. Will need coaching up. But has some experience taking snaps from center. Mother forbids him line up in the gun for the time being.

Poor footwork, has yet to take first steps so his drop backs are rough. Not a mobile QB, definitely won’t blow anyone away with his speed

Impressive eye discipline. Looks off his mother (in-house safety) before peeing directly on her.

Film junkie. Will watch film all night if his dad forgets to move him from in front of the computer.

Durable. No injury history whatsoever.

Questions about his mental toughness. Can whine about teammates. Has yet to show true leadership skills. No off the field trouble to speak of but immaturity is definitely a concern.

If he declared today I’d consider him a late round prospect purely for his high upside. Recommend holding off and continuing to develop before foregoing eligibility.

Honestly this is eerily applicable to Johnny Manziel as well. Especially the concerns about maturity.

One key facts that is conspicuously absent is the note that the little guy has a propensity to poop himself when the pressure is on. And when the pressure is off. In short: he poops all the time.

[H/T: Reddit]

 


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