Something Has To Be Wrong With Forbes’ NBA Team Valuations Because The No. 1 Team Has Me LOLing

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Forbes released its annual valuations for each NBA team today, ranking all 30 franchises and, no joke, the top two teams will have you cracking up—even if you already knew which teams would fall there because of the major markets they play in.

Per Forbes, the New York Knicks hold down the top spot with a valuation of $3 billion, meaning the team that’s 21-22 and currently out of the playoff picture in the shitty Eastern Conference actually has the highest value of any hoops team on the planet.

So forget about the Golden State Warriors—who check in at No. 6 on Forbes‘ list, are tearing up the league and are the envy of everyone in basketball—it’s the Knicks who are valued higher.

Maybe even funnier is the fact that the Los Angeles Lakers are No. 2 with a valuation of $2.7 billion. These are the same Lakers who are currently 9-34 and haven’t been able to beg a top free agent to sign with them in years to join Kobe Bryant. Maybe that all changes once The Black Mamba calls it quits next year, though?

As for a couple others shockers, the Cleveland Cavaliers and their insane payroll aren’t even in the top-10, for the same cost of the Knicks at No. 1, someone could, presumably, own the Spurs and Heat—who have won seven of the past 13 titles—and, even crazier, the average price to own an NBA franchise is a record $1.25 billion!!

Here’s how the entire list shakes down:

1. New York Knicks – $3 billion

2. Los Angeles Lakers – $2.7 billion

3. Chicago Bulls – $2.3 billion

4. Boston Celtics – $2.1 billion

5. Los Angeles Clippers – $2 billion

6. Golden State Warriors – $1.9 billion

7. Brooklyn Nets – $1.7 billion

8. Houston Rockets – $1.5 billion

9. Dallas Mavericks – $1.4 billion

10. Miami Heat – $1.3 billion

11. San Antonio Spurs – $1.15 billion

12. Cleveland Cavaliers – $1.1 billion

13. Phoenix Suns – $1 billion

14. Toronto Raptors – $980 million

15. Portland Trail Blazers – $975 million

16. Washington Wizards – $960 million

17. Oklahoma City Thunder – $950 million

18. Sacramento Kings – $925 million

19. Orlando Magic – $900 million

20. Utah Jazz – $875 million

21. Denver Nuggets – $855 million

22. Detroit Pistons – $850 million

23. Indiana Pacers – $840 million

24. Atlanta Hawks – $825 million

25. Memphis Grizzlies – $780 million

26. Charlotte Hornets – $750 million

27. Minnesota Timberwolves – $720 million

28. Philadelphia 76ers – $700 million

29. Milwaukee Bucks – $675 million

30. New Orleans Pelicans – $650 million

[H/T Forbes]

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