The Rams’ Application For Relocation To L.A. Took A Hot And Steamy Turd All Over The City Of St. Louis


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Ever since 1995, the St. Louis Rams have called the “Gateway City” home, enjoying some good times—including a Super Bowl win in the 1999 season—and some really crappy ones, too. And, unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few years, the team has been exploring options to get the hell out of the city because its owner, Stan Kroenke, is a motherfucker who loves money. (OK, so that might just be my personal opinion, but it’s probably not too far off.)

The Rams, who came from Los Angeles prior to moving to St. Louie, officially filed their relocation application yesterday and, well, it doesn’t look like they’re too fond of what the current town has to offer. Per Deadspin, here’s what the application read:

St. Louis lags, and will continue to lag, far behind in the economic drivers that are necessary for sustained success of an NFL franchise.


Compared to all other U.S. cities, St. Louis is struggling. One recent study reports that St. Louis ranks 490 out of 515 U.S. cities and 61st among the 64 largest U.S. cities in economic growth in recent years. That same study reported that St. Louis had the lowest rate of population growth of any major U.S. city from 2008 to 2014 – registering a loss of 1.74 percent of its citizens while most cities registered gains. Thus, the City of St. Louis ranks near the bottom of all U.S. cities of any size in terms of economic and population growth.

It’s one thing to put the simple phrase, “The St. Louis Rams informed the National Football League today that the Rams propose to relocate to the greater Los Angeles metropolitan area. The relocation would be effective for the 2016 NFL League Year,” on the team website—as the Rams did. But it’s a completely dick move to bash the city in which fans have flocked to watch the team play, dropping cash to see them fail to meet expectations year-after-year.

Now, to defend the Rams’ bold statements, a Business Journal report from early 2015 did echo similar news, stating that people are fleeing the city for brighter pastures in neighboring cities in the Midwest, but still, what a terrible PR move by the team—especially since there’s no guarantee the relocation to L.A. will definitely happen. Imagine the fallout should the team NOT leave St. Louis; Kroenke’s head will be wanted on a fucking stake!

Via the aforementioned Deadspin piece, the entire Rams proposal can be seen here—although it’s 29 pages long, so I doubt you’ll read the whole thing.

Rams Los Angeles Application

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One thing’s for sure, Kroenke, the Rams organization and, yep, even the NFL don’t seem to give two shits about the people of St. Louis, so good job on fucking yourself over there, fellas.

[H/T Deadspin]

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