Fox Analyst Rob Gronkowski Saying ‘Get That Nut’ On National Television His First Day On The Job Is What Legends Are Made Of


Imagine Gronk being called into the executive suite at Fox before his debut as an analyst on Thursday Night Football. He is wearing a cutoff sleeveless belly shirt and has Camille Kostek around his neck like a boa constrictor. He is shaking a protein shaker bottle that reeks of Captain Morgan.

Fox Exec: Robert, really happy to have you on board, but we are a humorless outlet that thrives on the mundane. Sooo no 69 talk, kapeesh?

Gronk: But, how come Troy Aikman is allowed to rip a bong to the face in the booth?

Fox Exec: He’s been drug tested multiple times. We suspect he’s jacking Joe Buck’s piss, but cannot comment on the ongoing investigation.

Gronk: Ok, dope. No 69 talk.

Also Gronk:

“He’s furry. He’s cute. … Most importantly, whenever he gets the chance, he gets that nut.”

There is no chance Gronk was not referring to Edelman laying pipe when he said this. I mean, look at these animalistic eyes.


Gronk is out here playing by the rules while also finding loopholes his first day on the job. This is veteran shit, especially for a guy whose had 20 concussions.

Don’t get used to life in the booth, big guy. See you on the field Week 14.