The Absurd Pregame Rituals Gisele Makes Tom Brady Do Make The TB12 Diet Seem Normal

by 2 years ago
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Over the past couple of decades, Tom Brady has established himself as probably the best quarterback to ever play in the NFL as he continues to rack up Super Bowl wins and smash records like a concerned mother from the 70s who thought rock and roll was the devil’s music.

During his playing career, Brady has also established himself as one of the weirdest dudes to ever play the game by doing things like avoiding strawberries at all costs, kissing a kid who’s too old to be kissed on the lips on the lips, and taking shots of water at a bar (presumably to stop himself from getting a sunburn).

There’s also the infamous TB12 Method, an avocado ice cream-filled diet/lifestyle Brady has subscribed to in order to maximize his longevity despite the best efforts of Bill Belichick.

However, according to CBS Sports, the TB12 Method isn’t the only unorthodox strategy Brady utilizes to give himself a competitive edge thanks to his wife Gisele, who has apparently come up with a method of her own to give her husband an edge over the competition:

“I have these little special stones and healing stones and protection stones and she has me wear a necklace and take these drops she makes and say all these mantras.”

Brady, who probably has a Goop subscription, was skeptical at first until he contracted a strong case of confirmation bias after the Pats managed to top the Seahawks in what was presumably Super Bowl XLIX:

“[A]bout four years ago, we were playing the Seahawks and she said ‘You better listen to me: This is your year, but this is all the things you’re going to have to do to win,’ and I did all those things, and by God, you know, it worked.”

Say what you will but you can’t really argue with the results.

Connor Toole is a Senior Editor at BroBible based in Brooklyn, NY who embodies more of the stereotypes associated with the borough than he's comfortable with. Frequently described as "freakishly tall," he once used his 6'10" frame to sneak in the NBA Draft before walking around the streets of NYC masquerading as the newest member of the Utah Jazz. Unfortunately, that wasn't enough to land him a contract, so he was forced to settle for writing on the internet for a living instead. If you're mad about something he wrote, be sure that any angry tweets you send note the similarity between his last name and a popular insult, as no one has ever done that before.

TAGSFootballGisele BundchenNew England PatriotsNFLTom Brady