Have you ever wanted a tightly wrapped American flag around your waist with a giant bald eagle face placed squarely on your junk? Or how about a Steve Harvey coronavirus mask or maybe the next evolution of jorts in the form of a hot and sexy denim speedo? But maybe just maybe you’re dying for a pair of Kansas City Chiefs overalls or leopard pants?
Yes, yes, yes and most definitely yes. And it’s all pretty easily found at Shinesty – the perfectly weird party gear website that I find myself escaping to every time I need a mental break from the miserable 2020 we’ve been having.
Now comes Shinesty’s new partnership with Budweiser to produce a line of officially licensed, retro-inspired Budweiser clothing.
Can I get a hell yeah?
Guaranteed to make a statement at your next BBQ or Crisco Twister tournament, the new clothing line is centered around Bud’s new 1970’s-inspired logo and includes swimsuits, full suits, short-sleeve suits, overalls and Pajamaralls – or overalls made with sweatpants fabric which is certainly the summer accessory you never knew you needed.
“Shinesty makes products for all of life’s social moments and, more often than not, Budweiser is a part of these moments,” said Chris White, CEO of Shinesty. “Our apparel with iconic Budweiser branding will amplify the good times at pool parties, beaches, ballparks, and BBQs around the world this summer.”
Blah, blah, blah, blah, corpspeak, whatever. More importantly, here’s what’s magical, at least in my mind.
Shinesty exists for one reason and one reason only: To provide crazy gear for idiots like me to wear when we need to lighten up our lives. And every time our president hates on someone unnecessarily or talks about injecting bleach – which seemingly is a daily occurrence – Shinesty is there. Each time I can’t go outside and do moderate-impact karate techniques on top of eight cinder blocks while wearing nothing but my Bill Clinton speedo – Shinesty is there. Every time I want to go skiing wearing a bright suit with 19 pockets for booze – Shinesty is there.
Shinesty has a sense of kindness and greatness – and at least in this American hero’s mind – might even make Chuck Norris weep with pride. No, it would make him weep. I’m certain of it.
So thank you, Shinesty. I needed you + booze. And I’ll need it again tomorrow and next week and next month and on Talk Like a Pirate Day and more.