This Woman May Choose To Forfeit Her $560 Million Powerball Winnings Over One Technicality


Imagine winning $560 million on the Powerball. You’d never again have to stress about finances, which for most of us, is the root of like 6o percent of anxiety. You want to by a mansion on the water in Santorini? Go ahead. Want to buy 10 of them? The world is yours.

In a vacuum, winning the lottery sounds like the most fortunate single thing that can happen to someone. But, I’ve watched far too much television to believe that these people go skipping blissfully into the sunset. They are hounded. By family, friends, and that creepy dude from accounting at your work. Every relationship you have changes. You can no longer identify as yourself, but as the person who won the lottery. You’ll have to hear the same jokes and kidding-but-not-kidding requests from fake friends. That shit would be torture.

Well, a New Hampshire lady has considered all the pitfalls of hitting rich after she won last month’s $560 million Powerball. The woman, known as Jane Doe, is asking a judge to let her keep the money and remain anonymous.

“She is a longtime resident of New Hampshire and is an engaged community member,” the woman’s attorney, Steven Gordon, wrote in the court documents, according to Washington Post. “She wishes to continue this work and the freedom to walk into a grocery store or attend public events without being known or targeted as the winner of a half-billion dollars.”

Only six states–Delaware, Kansas, Maryland, North Dakota, Ohio and South Carolina–allow lottery winners to remain anonymous. New Hampshire is not one of them. According to Washington Post, lottery officials claim the “integrity of the games depends on public identification of its winners as a protection against fraud and malfeasance.” Snapping photos of the winner with a giant check and a bigger smile is also an A+ marketing tool.

In a statement, New Hampshire lottery Executive Director Charlie McIntyre said the following:

“The New Hampshire Lottery understands that winning a $560 million Powerball jackpot is a life-changing occurrence,” the statement said. “Having awarded numerous Powerball jackpots over the years, we also understand that the procedures in place for prize claimants are critically important for the security and integrity of the lottery, our players and our games. While we respect this player’s desire to remain anonymous, state statutes and lottery rules clearly dictate protocols.”

At first, I thought should just suck it up and identify herself. But, when awful stories of lottery winners are publicized, I can understand her gripe. Back in 2006, a lady named Dorice ‘Dee Dee’ Moore set up a business with Abraham Lee Shakespeare after he won $30 million. Moore extorted cash from the illiterate laborer before murdering him and burying his body.

That changes things.

[h/t Washington Post]


Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.