A psychology expert is pulling back the curtain on the mental tactics servers and bartenders use to boost their tips.
Her viral breakdown of these psychological tricks has sparked debate about whether diners are being manipulated into leaving bigger tips. And some people aren’t happy about it.
Psychology Expert Reveals Two Tactics That Increase Tips
Scarlett (@scarlettreadspeople) explained how servers and bartenders can use psychology to manipulate customers into tipping more. Her video has more than 11,000 views.
The text overlay reads: “How To Make More Tips as a Server or Bartender / Using the Ben Franklin Effect + ‘Mini Conspiracy’ Psychology to Increase Your Tips.”
“You want your tables to tip you like they owe you child support? Here’s how to make more money as a server, part two,” she says in the video.
Here are the two tactics she shared:
Tactic 1: The Ben Franklin Effect
The Ben Franklin effect is a psychological phenomenon where asking someone for a favor tricks their brain into thinking they like you more than they actually do.
“The reason why this works is because their brain tricks them into thinking they like you more than they actually do because of the cost-benefit analysis. They wouldn’t do a favor for someone they didn’t like,” she says in the video.
Scarlett gives a specific example of how servers can use this.
Instead of simply asking for a Google or Yelp review, she suggests saying something like, “All of the servers are currently competing for the most Google or Yelp reviews. If I win, I get a day off. If you think you’ve had excellent service today and you wanna help me win, you can leave a review.”
“This works because they think, ‘Well, if I’m helping her, she must be worth helping.’ And that actually in turn makes them, like, you more,” Scarlett explains.
Tactic 2: The ‘Mini Conspiracy’ Method
Scarlett’s second tactic involves making customers feel like they’re getting inside information. She calls this building a “money conspiracy.”
“Have you ever felt like you’re an insider or given the inside scoop? It makes us feel important,” she says in the video.
She suggests servers say things like, “I’m not supposed to say this. But our chocolate cake is actually the only one we don’t make in-house. If you had to choose between the cheesecake or ice cream sandwich, I would choose one of those over the chocolate cake. It’s only mid. But you didn’t hear that from me.”
Other examples include mentioning a “secret fan favorite” dish or revealing what a celebrity ordered when they visited the restaurant.
“Just bringing them in on the secret, it makes them feel important, it makes them feel valued, and it makes them feel like they’re in the know,” she says.
In the video’s caption, Scarlett notes that these tactics helped her make “$1,000+ nights without giving away free drinks.”
How Americans Really Feel About Tipping
Scarlett’s tactics come at a time when Americans are increasingly frustrated with tipping culture.
According to a Pew Research Center survey, 72% of U.S. adults say tipping is expected in more places today than it was five years ago. The majority aren’t happy about it, with 57% having a negative view of this shift.
The survey found that people have mixed feelings about being asked to tip before they receive service. When presented with a screen or payment option asking for a tip upfront, 40% say they feel annoyed, while 32% feel awkward or uncomfortable. Only 25% say they feel neutral about it.
Tipping fatigue is real. Many Americans report feeling pressured to tip even in situations where it wasn’t traditionally expected, like grabbing coffee or picking up takeout. The survey revealed that 34% of adults say it’s extremely or very easy to know whether to tip for different services. But 30% say it’s somewhat difficult, and 12% find it extremely or very difficult.
Investopedia notes that while tipping is expected in full-service restaurants (typically 15-20%), fast-casual restaurants, coffee shops, and takeout orders don’t require tips. However, the prevalence of digital payment systems that prompt for tips has blurred these lines, making customers feel obligated even when the service doesn’t warrant it.
The psychology tricks Scarlett describes may be effective at increasing tips. But they also feed into the manipulation many diners are starting to resent.
Commenters React
“The customer,: oh so you’ve seen the TikTok too huh,” a top comment read.
“After seeing about five videos about how waiters and waitresses make $50 an hour, which is more than paramedics, I’m not tipping anymore,” a person said.
“Former server I used the favor thing and I’d win most contests,” another wrote.
“Great. More fleecing of the customers,” a commenter noted.
BroBible reached out to Scarlett for comment via TikTok direct message and comment.