I Tried The New Doritos 3D And, Yes, They’re Just As Delicious As I Remember Them

via BroBible

Ready for some good news? Doritos 3D are finally back! After being shelved from the snack food aisle for nearly two decades, Frito-Lay is finally throwing a bone to aging millennials like myself.

It’s a big comeback for those of us who fondly remember snacking in simpler times – the perfect chance for a new generation to discover the air puff radicalness of Doritos 3D and cash in on the nostalgia wave.

I remember munching on Doritos 3D in my friends’ basements on Friday night, playing video games, just around the time of the Y2K scare. Literally couldn’t have a better night as a teenager: Dortios 3D, a couple 2 liters of MTN DEW, a trip to Blockbuster, and Halo until the wee hours of the morning. Maybe throw in a little AOL Instant messenger and a sporadic ping pong game.

A package I wasn’t expecting showed up on my doorstep last week. It contained a limited edition Cyberpunk 2077 Doritos Fuel Cell – A psychedelic tube with red and blue lighting, triggered by a motion sensor. Looks like the EDM version of those pneumatic tubes that bank tellers used to use back in the day. Only 77 Doritos Fuel Cells were made, making it a pretty cool Night City souvenir commemorate the launch of the game, despite its glitchy roll-out.

The package also contained a note, asking if I’ve ever wondered what Doritos would look like in the year 2077.

I haven’t, but the nature of the question makes me hopeful we won’t snacking on nutrient-rich vegetable sludge via Skynet’s intravenous feeding tubes come 2077.

The Cyberpunk 2077 Doritos Fuel Cell contained a sleeve of Doritos 3D, which means an exclusive group of video game nerds like myself get to be THE VERY FIRST PEOPLE to try the next-gen Doritos 3D.

Very apropos, considering how many frantic nights I’ve spent with a bag of Doritos on my desk playing video games.

Still… The very first! I feel so honored.

Hence, my Doritos 3D review.

I remember why these things were all the rage back in 8th grade: They’re a triangular chip that’s a modern marvel of food science: A puffed tortilla corn chip, hollowed on the inside and yet a little bit more crispy than your traditional Doritos chip. The crunch is more like a Bugle than the crunch of a Doritos chip – It’s almost melts on the roof and tongue of your mouth like Rice Krispies do.

Doritos 3D are rumored for a roll out in mid-January. Imagine they’ll take the nation by storm come the Super Bowl, when some sort of whacky Doritos 3D dance craze will dominate TikTok.

Maybe, in a light bulb flash of corporate synergy, Doritos will enlist Future for a Super Bowl commercial?

Called it here if it happens.

In the meantime, I made a video of my Doritos 3D review and unboxing.

Enjoy the tastes of… the future!

Brandon Wenerd avatar
BroBible's publisher and a founding partner, circa 2009. Brandon is based in Los Angeles, where he oversees BroBible's partnership team and other business development activities. He still loves to write and create content, including subjects related to internet culture, food, live music, Phish, the Grateful Dead, Philly sports, and adventures of all kinds. Email: brandon@brobible.com